It’s the evening before Father’s Day and man have we had a week.
A week where not just one thing goes wrong but it all goes wrong.
In our family we like to celebrate Mothers Day and Fathers Day in a big way. We keep it simple and affordable but do it in a big way.
Mom or Dad get to sleep in, coffee or breakfast is made, we get to do whatever we love to do that day (mom: wineries, thrift stores, pedicures… dad: car shows, naps and shows) and then we make the favorite dinner of the celebrated parent… because parenting is ROUGH and what better way to celebrate than to be spoiled by everyone in the whole fam-damily! There is usually a kid made gift in the mix also.
Well, the last couple years I have majorly sucked at Father’s Day because I lost my dad and was drowning in the grief of it. My dad died in 2017 and that was my roughest Father’s Day to date. I cried all day long and could barely muster a happy fathers day to my husband. I couldn’t celebrate anything even though I am lucky to know many great men that deserve the best Fathers Day.
Fast forward to 2019.
We are drowning in the life of owning a fixer upper and all of our vehicles have decided to be POS at the same time. I mean, technically two were already… but its hitting all at once of coarse.
We sold our Jeep to pay to side our shop (because we are trying to fix this place up with cash) and as I bragged about my trusty little Prius the next week it ended up not being that trusty little car. Of coarse. I broke the windshield (an embarrassing story that MAYBE I will share someday) and the battery went out, again. One month after the warranty.
So here we are.
a 1990-something Jeep Comanche (my husbands love).
a 1969 Ford F-100 that my dad gave to me.
a recently acquired Saturn Due Redline (auction deal).
and a 2005 Toyota Prius…
and none of them work.
Isn’t this how life goes? It all breaks at once? When it rains it pours?
So now I sit here hoping that tomorrow will be the new better day that we need and that I can wake up early enough to make the kid craft for my husband with the kids, make the favorite coffee for the him… and instead of going to the car show we planned on my husband will fix the broken cars. BUT we will have his favorite dinner (ribs, Velveta Shells and Cheese, mashed potatoes with jalapeño poppers) and still celebrate the day and celebrate him because he is doing everything he can to fix all the broken things.
And how lucky are we that he can?
And even though this week has been HARD this evening we got to ride in my dads truck. We drove it down our newly paved road… It might not have been the drive my husband hoped for but we made it back to the shop before the engine puttered out.
But look at this first drive.
And listen to my sweet boys voice!
…and I got to put my arm out the window, fingers flowing through the wind like back when I was a kid… and listen to my kids squeal. I can’t even explain the feeling in my heart at that moment.
This is the truck that my dad and mom bought as a young couple in 1972 for $1,000/a $52 a month payment and loaded everything they owned into to drive from California to Washington to start a new life.
This is the truck that my dad squished the 3 of us kids into when he had custody of us for the weekend after my parents divorced.
This is the truck that I sat on my dads lap and “drove myself” when I was my kids age.
This is the truck that my dad spent so much time to customize and loved so much.
It’s sat for years and is rusty and broken but the smell of the truck reminds me to him of this day. I can sit in it and breath it in and remember those moments like they were yesterday.
Seeing Darren work on it daily and late into the night has brought tears to my eyes most evenings… and even though it will never be a show truck I think that my dad would be so happy that we are getting it going and going to use it for working around our little piece of property.
I can’t even describe fully what that means to me.
I can’t even express how much I appreciate that Darren worked so hard to do that when there is so much is going on.
And now I have rambled on so much that is IS Fathers Day.
So Happy Fathers day to all the dads.
To my husband who does so much and has gone along with my crazy ideas and our crazy changes in life… who supports my dreams and pushes me to be the best I can be… who drives me crazy some days… but who I have shared the last (almost) 20 years of my life with. Who sometimes I think is crazy but is brilliant and inspires me to be who I am. Our life isn’t perfect or what we ever thought or maybe even what we wanted it to be but it is ours… and somehow we will get through the rough days and the rough weeks and it will all work out. You are the love of my life and I love you.
To my dad who I miss every day. I wish you could see the place we bought and the life we are trying to make. I wish you could see the things that we build and the way that we are raising our kids. I know you would be proud… and that makes my heart so happy and me miss you even more.
To my father in law who is one of the most sweet, genuine and caring men I have ever known. Talented in anything he makes or fixes. Who was the best example that my husband could ever have for a man.
To my step dad who has been an amazing father to me when he didn’t have to be. Who took care of me and taught me to make a good life for myself and responsibility. He loves me like his own and more importantly my kids the same.
To my brother, who even though he isn’t a father, has always been an example of a good man to my sister and I. A man that follows his heart and his passion and lived the life his heart has wanted and been an inspiring example since I can even have memories.
Happy Fathers Day everyone. It’s a special day to celebrate. No matter the rough times we are going through, the ones we have lost… it’s a day to remember all of those things.
Peace, love & sunflowers,